I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions. Never have, probably never will. If you want a long-winded explanation of such see my old blog post here: Turkey Woods Farm Blog It’s all about beginnings and endings.
My life is all about learning stuff – new stuff, old stuff, long-dead-but-regurgitated stuff. From my perspective nothing we do in life is regrettable or worthless. Sometimes we learn the most from the biggest mistakes. So my end of 2015 post is all about things I learned. You may not think they are fabulous or even important, your lessons over the last year may have been more meaningful or dramatic, but these are the ones that matter to me.
1. Setting goals and announcing those publicly so others can hold me accountable is a good thing in my life. When I can’t motivate myself, or drag myself through yet another day, having other people push me is important.
2. Relationships don’t always take a linear path that is expected and seemingly normal. Sometimes they meander around like a stream in a mountain valley. They can flow quickly and take your breath away and then swirl in an eddy going nowhere allowing you to catch your breath again and then catch up in the current and flow along smoothly for awhile before crashing off a waterfall and beginning the process over.
Sometimes they are just confusing and you have to set them aside and stare at them for awhile to see if they morph into something you can handle.
Sometimes they are like running a race car into a concrete wall, metal and glass shards flying everywhere, body parts torn and fragmented, blood oozing out.
Sometimes they are like stars in the night sky, beautiful, magical, and completely out of reach.
And sometimes, when you find one that really touches your soul, they are a combination of all of the above.
3. Two things you have no control over are a) what family you belong to and b) who you fall in love with. Trying to control either one will only end in frustration.
4. Expectations other people have of you are none of your business. Like opinions and judgements and old fish, they all stink after a few days. The only expectations that matter are your own.
5. Plans no matter how well conceived, controlled, thought out, or executed can and will go wrong. Best to have backups in place and learn to roll with the punches when things change.
6. Age is only a number and has nothing to do with who you are, how you act, what you think, what you can accomplish, or who your friends will be.
7. Creative endeavors are more fulfilling when they are shared with other people. The audience for what you write, draw, paint, compose, sculpt, etc … is every bit as important as the creation process.
8. Persistence is sometimes the only thing you can count on to get from point A to point B. Feeling right, being positive, having a plan, etc … are all well and good, but some days they just aren’t there to grab hold of. Be persistent.
9. People are human and need to be forgiven many many many times over. They aren’t perfect. They can’t always be there for us. They can’t always deal with what we need them to deal with. They make mistakes. They can’t always be the people we need them to be. We just have to accept them as they are and as they come to us … and let the rest of it go.
10. Life is not an either/or proposition. Most of the time it hangs somewhere between one choice and another. Painting everything in black and white leaves us wanting and needing more.